On the way home he makes his pronouncement, every word a single sentence. "I. Do. Not. Want. To. Die. When. I. Get. Old." I nod at his reflection in the rear view mirror. "Okay," I say.

“We just got together at the wrong time in your life,” I say, as if by stating it I can accept it. What I do not say is that, even after three years together, I know he is still not sure of what he wants. If he would only just once turn over and tell me to stay, I would.

Winnona's hand reaches in and touches my mouth. I hear her laugh through the rush, and the water splashes over my face when I come out. She sticks her head back under a bubble of water again, and Sam is looking at me from the other side of the dam and I think, I truly think for a moment, that I will explode.